20 august 2010 - g10, f/3.2 1/80s, iso-200
the roof. alone. for now.
it's a place where the wind can blow more straight and true which also affords the mind-thoughts a bit more freedom to fully develop.
after reflecting on the past year and then the past five, some of the things that people have done to me, some of the reasons people have given me to send me along on my own (later discovered to be nothing more than excuses), have been just as amazing as the destinations or stories of coincidence or experience that fill this blog. and sometimes it's time to stop trying, to admit you don't fit in, and to keep finding a way to be yourself.
there are other people out there that lead interesting lives and perhaps that's the key word: lead.
these are the people that will join you on your crazy adventures and they're usually the other characters directly involved in the stories you'll tell: that person at the bookstore, or maybe the person that hopped on a train to a city where they've never been just to see a movie, or maybe the person that was crazy enough to let you rush out of work only to plow through traffic just for a few hours' chatting before their next flight.
alone on the roof with empty chairs and a fantastic view. it's time to fill these chairs, yes, and as this new portion of life starts to take root with new connections and new friendships, at least one thing will hold true: we must keep learning.
which will guide us on adventures that will defy our own imaginations.
~ = ~
with each trip, taking things from one apartment to another, there's plenty of time for reflection. a lot has happened in the past year and a lot of decisions had to be made and while i keep writing about these lessons learned (some driven home very hard), it's hard to ignore the fear that comes around on occasion when setting out on your own. you will always question your sanity in doing so but somehow, in the end, the logic seems to return to a few same points that remain the same: you'll never find out until you do it, and the friends that matter are the ones that are there or are there in spirit with you when you do.
'fear' is just another four letter f-word.